In the thick of it

For just under a year I have been having an affair with a married man.
This isn't something I am proud of. It isn't any place I thought I would find myself in, ever.
But now I am here and I have made a choice to love this man.

I left my husband about 6 years ago. He had an affair. I was leaving long before this came to light.
What I do know is that I had left the marriage emotionally long before and a space was created for this
new person to come in. When I left I was glad she had come in, because getting away, which is what I
needed to do so desperately, was made easier because my husband had someone else.

Yesterday, everything came out. The wife and the two grown up daughters confronted him.
He admitted it all, and told them he would never see me again. He says to me, everything will stay the same,
but he needs to be careful. Either he needs to decide he wants his family, or he needs to see what is on the
other side, because he will inevitably be found out again if he carries on seeing me. Is this some sort of
way to sabotage his marriage completely so he is thrown out and he doesn't have to choose?

Truth is I feel so much better now it is out. If he asked me to leave him so he could work at his marriage I would
gladly do so. I love this man, and if that is what he wants I would support him in it. But I can not leave him till
he tells me too. Till he makes that choice. I am just not strong enough to do that.

If he wants to leave his family then we need to find out whether we have a chance at something that is not
just made up of lovely afternoons and fantasy.

It is all in the lap of the gods. But I am happy now that everyone is facing reality. Now everyone can deal with what
is really going on, and maybe something healthy can come of this. Even if I lose him, I have finally experienced something
that gives me faith that relationship is possible for me.